Okay, so let’s talk Body Image. Everyone has their own perceptions of their bodies. Some have realistic, some negative, some normal, some great. I don’t care you who are, everyone is going to struggle with body image at some point, maybe a day, maybe an hour, maybe a lifetime.
So, clearly from my story we know that body image has been an issue for me. We also know that I have 3 little girls in my life who I think are absolutely perfect and beautiful. I tell them all the time, and they believe it. I hope they will always believe it, but as they get older things will change. As their mom, I will always promote positivity and healthy body image, not only to them, but about myself and those around us too.
I know that for my children to believe in them-selves, I need to
A. Believe in them (Easy Enough)
B. Believe in myself, love, myself, and mean it.
It’s taken me a while to actually be comfortable with myself. I am human, I have flaws, and there will always be things about myself that I don’t love, but for all those things I don’t love, there’s so many more things I do love about myself. Every part of me good and bad, makes me who I am. All the people I have in my life who love me, love me for all of me.
No one has ever said to me “Sorry I can’t be your friend today, you’re not having a good hair day.” Or “sorry I don’t like you anymore, you can’t fit into your jeans.” That would be insane, right?
We are our own worst enemies. Our toughest critic is ourselves. We need to stop that.
It’s so much more important to be a good person, that’s where it counts. When your friend is having a dark moment, Are you there for them? YES! That’s what people remember.
Of course remembering this and believing this is all easier said then done.
As my girls get older I will continue to be positive. I will promote healthy food choices, body and heart healthy activities. They are too young to understand what I struggled with growing up, but eventually they will. I plan to be open and honest about my battle with my eating disorder. I want them to be able to ask questions, and I want them to know what I went through, and I want them to see how I overcame it, how strong I am, and how I am making the world a better place by reaching out, sharing my story, and helping others. Right now, I tell them “Mommy helps people feel good.”
Children are so innocent and their slates are so fresh. If you bring them up, and keep bringing them up, they will stay up.
I have to make sure that I am mindful of my surrounding. I have to make sure that my actions and reactions to things are what I would feel good about my children mirroring. If I say “These pants make me look fat.” I have to be okay with the fact that I could have a mini me saying that same exact thing in the very near future.
When judging myself, I am constantly asking myself “Do I judge other people on this?”
“Would I ever say this to a friend?.” The answer is NO! So why do I think it’s okay to judge myself this way?
I think it’s my job as a mom to show them that every BODY is beautiful. I think starting now, and even more so as they get older finding the beauty in every person we meet. I love to compliment people. I also do. Chances are when I see you, I will tell you I like your outfit, your shoes, your purse, or your hair. If I say it, I mean it. I think it’s important for my girls to hear me giving positive feedback to others. Unfortunately, these are all “materialistic” traits that some might categorize as “Vain.”
Truthfully, I think it would be more beneficial for me to compliment how much I love your heart, how thoughtful you are, how compassionate you are, what a great friend you are, how your passion for life is inspiring. These are the wonderful things about people that don’t get nearly as much attention as they should.
Social Media is an aspect that unfortunately isn’t going anywhere. No matter what I do there will be diet ads, models with unhealthy and unrealistic bodies everywhere we turn that will be glorified as beautiful. That is an entirely different topic that I totally want to explore later on, but for now I will keep the communication lines open for my children, and to anyone else who needs me.
I can’t fix the world, but I certainly can make positive changes. I have the power to shape my children’s lives. I know what I want for them, I know what I want for me, and as a Mom it is in my power to keep them safe, let them know how loved they are, and keep their hearts growing beautifully.